Do as you would be done by
The midwife insisted the baby was breech. However the obstetrician would not accept this judgment, drawn from many years of experience. "I can feel the bulging membranes. We'll use a pair of Cocker's forceps to rupture them, and we should then be able to get things moving." "What you can feel aren't membranes, Mr Cameron!" "Of course they are!"
"I tell you, that baby is breech. What's more, it's a boy! And if you take a pair of forceps to break what you think are bulging membranes, I shall come in tomorrow and do to you what you're proposing to do to him! Because what you can feel are his testes!"
The baby, successfully delivered without further intervention, was indeed breech - and a boy. Seeing the midwife the next day, the obstetrician was suitably abashed. "It's OK, I'm wearing my cast iron underpants!" he laughed nervously.